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Cleaning up after the Dog
by Jason Tandon
estimated
reading time

1:32
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Pull plastic bag from pocket
and wave it like a flag

or diploma. Make sure many people
congratulate your care
for the community.

Check bag for holes.
Double-check.
 
Inspect stool for odd hues.
Greens, blues, blood.

Evaluate consistency.

You don’t want to leave smears
on the sidewalk or grass—no prints.

Getaway must be clean.

Prepare to go in for all of it.
Hold breath.
Grab, clamp, reverse bag, twist, knot, cinch.

Smell hands.
Go ahead, you’re curious.

Hold loaded bag high in the air,
assure onlookers that Everything is Okay.

If a cop should cruise by,
his crew cut bristling
in the sun,

hold that bag higher,
so he, too, can salute

your contribution.

 The bomb diffused,
the world a little safer, a little cleaner,

will not offend the deep treads
of someone else’s shoes.


Jason Tandon Jason Tandon is the author of two chapbooks of poetry Rumble Strip (sunnyoutside) and Flight (Finishing Line Press). His poems have appeared in many journals including Columbia Poetry Review, Del Sol Review, DIAGRAM, Good Foot, and New York Quarterly. He will begin teaching at Holyoke Community College in the fall.
   
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Comments panel
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Todd 6.22.2007
I love this line: "assure onlookers that Everything is Okay."
colleen 6.22.2007
Have I ever been that curious? Thinking...thinking...
SarahJ 6.23.2007
This is all so strangely familiar...! I swear, though, that I do not sniff my hands. wonderful poem.
Tonja 10.18.2007
Loved this article. It kepted me giggling till the end. Thanks.
Pat Myers 2.16.2010
Wouldn't a metaphorical bomb be "defused," rather than "diffused," spread out and diluted -- especially by sealing it off in a bag?
Mike 2.17.2010
Seeing a friend who recently acquired a rescued dog go through these motions makes this coincidentally funny…right Jani?
Toby Brooke 3.3.2010
This beats our dog-walker's doggerel: Take plastic bags along with you. Leave the piddle, scoop the poo! Am sending Mr. Tandon's poem to our dog-owning family members.
 
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